Saturday, February 02, 2008

Has enthusiasm for breastfeeding gone too far?

Original article here
LOL I snorted a few times reading this.

Like handbags, bikini waxes, and romantic comedies, breastfeeding is one of those things dads have always been happy not knowing much about.

We might appreciate how breastfeeding boosts our kids' immunity (and our wives' physiques), but on the whole we've remained blissfully ignorant about exactly what happens under the blouse or blanket at feeding time.

But no more.

Increasingly, dads are taking an active and involved role in all aspects of parenting. We change nappies. We learn Lamaze. We hold forth on the pros and cons of cord bank registries. I once heard a guy boast about his newborn's Apgar Score like he'd won the World Cup.

I'm as hyper-involved as any new dad, but I never thought I'd have much role in breastfeeding, which is, I figured, pretty much entirely a mother-child transaction.

Then I had my first kid.

In the delivery room, I was there to witness the moment my son latched on for the first time. I studied La Leche League literature and kept a close watch on the nursery to guard against unapproved formula feedings. I stood by as the hospital lactation consultant performed a hands-on demonstration of proper positioning.

All of which was fine, really. Unlike my own dad and countless previous generations of fathers, I was determined to be a full and equal partner in childrearing. If that meant I had to learn first-hand about the laxative properties of colostrum or stand by as a gigantic Russian nurse groped my wife's woman-parts, so be it.

But then came our visit with the groovy pediatrician.

Soon after bringing our son home from the hospital, my wife and I went to see our neighborhood family doctor, a local legend known for his celebrity daughter and affinity for holistic, alternative care.

Much to our dismay, nursing was not going well. We couldn't be sure the source of the problem - blocked ducts? nipple confusion? - but the result was that our baby wasn't eating. We hadn't slept in two days.

Holding our weeping, starving son in the doctor's shabby-chic waiting room, surrounded by fashionable couples and those thousand-dollar strollers that look like lunar landing modules, we looked like victims of a violent crime.

After a quick exam and quiz on nutrition, the doctor got down to business. He had my wife unbutton her shirt and instructed her how to use her forefinger and thumb to "express" a dollop of milk onto his finger.

And then he licked it. "Sweet," he said. Whereupon he extended a finger to me. I declined.

It's been eight years since that encounter and it still disturbs me in a way I find hard to explain. It wasn't lascivious - both my wife and I got the distinct sense the doctor had all the best intentions and was simply taking the most direct, least prudish route possible to diagnose our problem. He was simply doing what groovy pediatricians do.

But still. To my surprise, my horror at the event wasn't shared by my Baby Bjorn-wearing, Diaper Genie-packing brothers.

One friend, an altogether sane and well-adjusted father of two, casually mentioned that he sometimes squirted a bit of banked breast milk into his morning coffee (a habit his wife didn't exactly support - "That's our night out!" she cried.)

I've heard about groups of mothers who have no qualms nursing each other's kids. Go online and you can find adult testimonials on the cancer-fighting properties of breast milk along with recipes for a beverage known as a "lactuccino."

Another couple recently relayed a story that demonstrates how comfortable some dads have become in the finer points of breastfeeding. A month after the birth of their first child, they hired a sitter and headed out for their first date as parents. But upon pulling into a multiplex parking lot, mom found that the time away from home had left her engorged, leaking and highly uncomfortable. No way would she be able to sit still for two hours, she said. After some tense negotiation, the husband agreed to duck into the back seat of the car and relieve her distress himself.

Not only did he get to see the movie, he said, his hair had a silky sheen for weeks afterward.

Far be it from me to judge, but I think this qualifies as going too far in being an equal-partner dad. I'm ready to nurture my kids and assist my wife in ways previous generations would have found ridiculous. I will sterilize parts of the breast pump and warm up bottles for late-night feedings.

But sampling the merchandise? That's just gross.

(Christopher Noxon is a freelance writer. Any opinion in the column that is issued every two weeks are solely those of Mr. Noxon. You can e-mail him at cnox

Friday, February 01, 2008

One of My Favorite Ads..

This was out about 2002 and Mike and I STILL laugh about it. Classic.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

At The Good Ol' Hockey Game...

Mike scored some tickets to the hockey game last night, and luckily Uncle Wyatt was available to babysit the kids, so off we went. The tickets ended up being really good ones, (not surprising for company tickets) we were ten rows away from the ice.

I took some pics for Mr K to see what Rexall looks like. Hopefully Mike's turn at the tickets will come up soon (it was someone else from work who took us on their tickets) and then we have 4 tickets and can take Mr K as well.

I know Mr K would love it, but I was really hoping that the guy a few seats over doesn't have season tickets, what a drunken loudmouth! I mean, he DID have us laughing, but I would have had to say something if I took K there. Some of his comments included:

"McTavish sucks balls!"
" Get off your knees, you're blowing the game" (ok this one I just about cried with laughter tho)
" Staios! You suck! Two minutes for being on the ice!"

Some of those I really don't want to have to explain to my four year old LOL.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

The List Is Out!

I love the list of baby names in Alberta, I wait for it every year (what a geek). I can't help it, after choosing unique names for the kids, I am so curious to see if they are getting more popular or not. I know there are a few of you who love this list too, so here you go

Alberta Top Baby Names

Mr K's actually fell from previous years, but the Princess's name has almost doubled (from 15 to 27). Oh no! LOL.

I actually found my name one year, but only that one year LOL, and spelled exactly like mine too.

Monday, January 28, 2008

Warms the Cockles of Me Heart

SMART husband. Brought these home and a KitKat. Damn.

It's Effing Cold Out There!

Yah, nothing like -30 and a windchill of -46. This would be Mike's shoveling job this morning. I looked out the window to see a wee bit of shoveling done, then footprints to the van... I had to laugh, I don't blame him, that is freaking cold.
Dinner last night, not so fancy, but I made Cajun pork, and it wasn't too bad. Basically breaded pork sirloin pieces with Cajun seasoning in the flour then fried...I could do without them but Mike really liked them. Then our favorite veggies, roasted red peppers with zucchini...mmmm. Then cheese casserole.

And my newest love, seasoning with a built in grinder, nothing like freshly ground Cajun seasoning, all for the price of 3 bucks at Superstore. I need to see what other kinds they carry.

And that is it. Today will be spent finding all sorts of things to do in the house, good thing I am loaded up on paints and crafty things for the kids. The basement still has all the seats from the van so maybe we will have a few "trips" to the moon or the some baking...

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Mmmmmm TV

Nice snowstorm that blew in today, holy smokes. We haven't even looked at the sidewalk, Mike was hopeful and cleared it this morning, but now its so bad that you can't tell where the sidewalk is in comparison to our lawn, its all the same height. Have fun shovelling hon! I think we get worse wind out here, it seems to drift...I would hate to think that its really THAT much snow that we are getting.

Our weekend project....setting up the new TV. It's too big and too ostentatious and too loud and I love it. :) We rented some Blu-ray movies for tonight to try out the Blu-ray player and I can't wait! The new Harry Potter and the newest Die Hard...frick I am worse than a man, I really am. I can't WAIT to get the kids to bed and watch all 58 glorious inches of Bruce Willis. (wait, that sounded quite dirty.....)

So thanks to my brother and dad who went to the States to pick up the tv's and Blu-ray's for everyone, and Dad for paying for the larger part of it. You are looking at the rest of my lifetime of birthday presents from my parents, but I think it was worth the trade. Hell, they don't even have to call me on my birthday anymore if they don't want.

Friday I went and saw 27 Dresses with Amanda and Brandy, and it was exactly what I wanted it to be, mindless chick flick. Which is a good thing after all the trouble we went to, to go and see it. Firstly, I arrived at the 7:40 movie at 7:36 thanks to an accident on the way and busy traffic around the theater. Pull into the cinema and no parking for miles. Then I notice that the entrance is literally crammed with people, right to the doors. Look at my cellphone and its totally dead, and my car charger is broken. So I was like Eff this, and went to the nearest payphone, called Mike, told him to call the girls and let them know. I call him back and my ass was directed BACK to the theater where they were waiting. We finally figure out its playing in St Albert, drive around there lost for a while. End up finding the theater, which was probably the most grungy, falling apart theater I have seen in a while. The seat in front of us was half hanging backwards, all broken, and there was a mound of popcorn at our feet. OH! And a bug flying around! The good news was that is was 17 bucks for the ticket, popcorn,pop and a chocolate bar. It was worth the grunge.

So I digress. I had picked up a couple gardening magazines at Safeway and I am just drooling with anticipation. I need to find a job to pay for my habit tho, I have champagne tastes on a beer budget.

And what else... oh yes, speaking of great dads, mine lent me his old Minolta camera so I can fiddle around with SLR and see if I really do want to buy one, or just get a nice point and shoot. Its film, so that's SO hard to get used to, not instantly seeing the picture.

Umm.. I am missing craft night cause there is no way I am driving on these roads in the dark, that sucks, I was looking forward to my magazines, and a latte and some chatter....sigh.

Have I mentioned I am so done with winter?